


Memories, both old and new

by strikedawn



Category: IDOLiSH7 (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, written for the i7 Secret Santa 2019 event!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:27:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21952945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strikedawn/pseuds/strikedawn
Summary: Minami lost something important.Luckily for him, the perfect person has the perfect solution to his problem.
Relationships: Natsume Minami/Rokuya Nagi
Comments: 5
Kudos: 27





	Memories, both old and new

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Luna_Arsenica](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luna_Arsenica/gifts).



> This was my first time joining a SS exchange and I had so much fun! I'll definitely join in again next year!!
> 
> I hope you enjoy your gift, Luna Arsénica!! Merry Christmas!!

“…Mina? Everything okay?”

Minami looked up from his bag to find his bandmates looking at him quizzically, their expressions ranging from confusion to slight amusement. The cold winter air of Tokyo made them all restless to reach their café of the day, but Torao, Haruka, and Touma had stopped the moment they had realized Minami wasn’t following after them. Minami felt a slight pang of guilt at forcing his friends —wasn’t that word a marvel of its own? _Friends_? — to stay in the cold before he forced a smile onto his face.

“It is alright, Inumaru-san,” Minami said, not quite meeting Touma’s eyes. “Let’s get inside, it feels like it’s getting colder by the second…”

A soft hand wrapped its fingers around Minami’s wrist, right there where the end of his glove met the beginning of his coat’s sleeve. Minami looked at that hand first, and then looked up to Haruka’s concerned eyes. The pang of guilt was now a hook digging in deep.

“We won’t pry if you don’t want to share, but you don’t have to lie to us, Minami,” Haruka said softly, squeezing Minami’s wrist once. “You look sad.”

“ _Troubled_ , more like it,” Torao added, tilting his head to look at Minami and letting his hair fall to the side. “Did something happen?”

Minami looked at his friends one by one, swallowing down a sigh. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to be truthful to them, not at all. They just had so much to think about, so much work to do, both for ZOOL and themselves, Minami didn’t want to bother them with the small things.

But if their expressions were any indicator, Minami wasn’t doing a good job at that.

So, finally letting go of the sigh he was holding, Minami told them the truth: “I lost my scarf.”

The other three blinked at him owlishly, the movement so coordinated that they almost looked like cartoon characters. “…You lost a scarf?” Torao asked, as if he was certain he had heard wrong and was expecting to be corrected.

“Yes, Midou-san.”

“That’s why you look like I just burnt your lyrics notebook on purpose?”

“Oi, Tora…” Touma added, elbowing Torao lightly on the side, but Touma paid him no mind.

“I’m just saying, you can just buy another one! We can walk by that shop you like on our way home if you want, Minami. No need to look so gloomy.”

Minami didn’t even have it in him to correct him. He was too busy berating himself for losing the scarf in the first place; that piece of soft fabric the color of milk coffee that had accompanied Minami for years now… how could he have been so careless—?

“Thank you, Midou-san,” Minami said with a nod and a smile that go beyond the corner of his mouth. “I—“

“Let’s look for it,” Haruka blurted out quickly, and his words were as surprising as the grip of his hand on Minami’s arm.

“Haru?”

“I… It has to be important, that scarf,” Haruka exclaimed himself, looking from Touma to Torao only to set his eyes on Minami. “So we’ll help you look for it! And maybe once we find it, you can tell us the story behind it… alright?”

The petition was so soft, so sweet, Minami felt the hook in his chest twist once before disappearing completely. It had been Haruka’s idea but Touma quickly jumped in, nodding with his head as he started talking out loud about revisiting the places they had last been in. Minami had been wearing the scarf yesterday, so it couldn’t be too far or too lost, Touma reasoned.

Even Torao nodded his consent as he pushed his hands into his own pockets, adding to Touma’s monologue: “If we separate, we can cover more ground. Minami, any idea where it could be?”

“You…” Minami looked at his friends, one by one. “You really don’t have to do this, it is just a scarf…”

“No, it’s not,” Touma replied with a grin. “I want to know the story behind it too, so get ready! I’m gonna find it for you, Mina!”

“Who says it’ll be you the one to find it?” Torao added with a teasing glint in his eyes. “I’ll have you know, I have an _incredible_ ability to investigate—“

Haruka rolled his eyes, finally letting go of Minami if only to cross his arms over his chest. “You’re not a superhero, you know. And _I’ll_ be the one to find the scarf for Minami. Besides, I’m the one who asked to hear the story first!”

Their friendly bickering warmed up the air around them. Minami observed them, observed these three people who had been strangers to him not too long ago… and finally he smiled, the first real smile since realizing the scarf wasn’t in his bag anymore. He even _giggled,_ soft and against the back of his hand, but the others heard it nevertheless.

They stopped to look at Minami too, matching relieved smiles curling at their lips.

“Thank you, everyone,” Minami said, feeling it from deep within his bones. “Truly.”

* * *

Somehow, Minami found himself walking the path by the Zero Arena, alone.

They had separated not long after Minami had thanked them, following Torao’s plan to separate, Haruka’s directions to where each one of them would go, and Touma’s request to meet back at the café in an hour to report back. Minami had said his goodbyes to them feeling reassured, like finding his scarf again wouldn’t be such a farfetched idea.

But now, 45 minutes after that…

Well. Minami didn’t need to pull his cards out to know this would be fruitless.

His next sigh rose into the air in the form of a small, white cloud. The silence around him was so thick that Minami could hear the sound of his own boots making the snow on the ground crunch; it truly was a winter day in Tokyo, one of the coldest in the latest years, according to the news. But the bite of the cold against Minami’s cheeks was more intense than it should have been, as a continuous reminder of what he had lost.

And yes, technically it was just a piece of fabric, but to Minami—

To Minami, it was—

Another sigh, and the puff of smoke that came with it was almost dense enough to cover the figure sitting at one of the benches up ahead. Minami only saw it because the path was deserted; no one in their right mind would leave the comfort and warmth of their homes in such a cold day like that day, so Minami was surprised to find he wasn’t the only one daring to walk the icy streets. For a moment, as he walked closer and closer to the figure, Minami almost thought it could be one of his bandmates, having come to get him after his own search had been in vain.

But there was no mistaking the bright tuft of hair coming out of a fancy beanie, or the regal nose halfway hidden into a fluffy, rainbow-colored scarf, or the sparkling blue of that pair of eyes that looked into the beyond like it held the secrets of the universe.

Minami’s heart skipped a treacherous beat at the sight, making him stop dead in his tracks.

“…Rokuya-san,” Minami said softly after a second, two, that seemed to stretch into the silence around them.

Nagi didn’t even move. He simply blinked, as if coming back from a deep dream, before his blue eyes moved to Minami. But his expression didn’t change, and not for the first time Minami felt a familiar tug on his heartstrings.

“…Minami,” Nagi said softly, straightening on the bench. And made Minami’s heart do something complicated again because despite the misplaced accent on his name, despite Nagi’s characteristic voice, Minami—Minami would never get used to Nagi saying his given name like that.

And he didn’t mean that in a bad way, either.

“It’s been a while,” Minami replied, not moving closer but not moving away either. “What are you doing here?”

Nagi’s eyes returned to the horizon, somewhere in the structure of the Zero Arena, but Minami didn’t feel dismissed. It was one of the things that made Nagi so interesting to Minami; even when he wasn’t saying anything, Nagi always managed to say a lot with his body. “My friends are excited for _Christmas_ ,” he explained, voice full of warmth as he said the word ‘friends’. But his expression seemed tired, something Minami had never seen on Nagi before. “But I don’t feel like being excited today.”

That was strange, coming from the only “perpetually happy” person Minami knew. “And why is that?”

Again, a long pause that didn’t seem to belong in Nagi’s world. It felt loaded with things Nagi didn’t dare to say—or simply didn’t want to share with Minami. That was fair; they weren’t friends, not in the way Minami was with ZOOL, and he wouldn’t expect Nagi to trust in him to the point they would share their worries with each other.

But… ever since Minami had discovered Nagi’s warm, caring side he had wanted… if only for a bit, he wanted—

“It’s snowing today,” Nagi said finally, as if that explained everything.

After a moment of thought, Minami realized it did. “…Snow always looked more beautiful in Northmare, didn’t it?”

“ _Oh,_ no one should compare Northmare and _Japan,_ ” Nagi shook his head with something akin to a pout, as if suddenly very disappointed in Minami. “It’s like trying to compare a _beautiful girl_ with an episode of Kokona!”

Minami blinked, so confused that, for a long moment, he even forgot about the cold. “I… don’t think I understand what you just said, Rokuya-san.”

Nagi didn’t seem bothered by it. In fact, he simply looked at Minami as his smile grew into a luminous grin, his blue eyes shining in the gray atmosphere of that winter day. Not for the first time —not even for the first time that day—Minami’s breath caught at the beauty of Rokuya Nagi, and the sweetness of his smile, the warmth of his eyes.

Minami definitely didn’t feel the cold now, as he regarded Nagi.

“Rokuya-san…” Minami started slowly, narrowing his eyes. “…Are you teasing me?”

“ _Me?”_ Nagi exclaimed, pushing a hand against his own chest in mock disbelief. “ _Never!”_

Minami couldn’t help it; Nagi’s antics were so dramatic, so _Nagi_ , that a giggle escaped from Minami’s mouth before he could hide it into his hand. It felt good, too, like letting go of some kind of weight Minami hadn’t realize he was holding.

And, judging by the way Nagi’s gaze softened, he realized that too. “That’s better.”

“Pardon?” Minami asked, still with traces of his amusement on his mouth.

“You seemed _very sad_ when you were coming this way. It’s too much of a beautiful day for you to be sad, Minami.”

The heat on his cheeks made Minami wish he had something to hide in. At least, he thought, he could always blame it on the cold. “I’m fine, Rokuya-san. It’s nothing.”

Nagi’s expression was still soft when he tilted his head to the side, regarding Minami closely. “It’s not nothing,” he declared, just before extending a hand towards Minami in a becoming gesture. “Sit with me! It’s not good to walk around while sad.”

Minami almost protested. But there was a part of him that longed to be understood. His ZOOL friends were kind, and Minami was absolutely sure they were looking for his scarf tirelessly, but—

If there was anyone out there — Minami thought to himself as he moved closer to Nagi and sat down on the bench —, if there was anyone out there who could ever understand what Minami was feeling…

“I lost my scarf,” Minami blurted out in an action so uncharacteristic of him, he almost bit down on his tongue in his surprise.

“ _Oh!_ I’m _sorry_ , Minami,” Nagi said, sounding so affected one could have thought Minami losing his scarf was _his_ fault.

Minami shook his head, another fond smile adorning his mouth. “It’s alright,” he said, trying (and mostly failing) to sound nonchalant. “It’s my own fault for being so careless.”

“You’re the last person I would describe as careless,” Nagi said easily, looking pensive. “Are you sure you simply didn’t leave it back home? Maybe it’s still there!”

“It’s… it’s not even about the scarf itself,” Minami admitted. “I…” Could he say it? Would Nagi even want to hear it, after everything that had happened? Minami found—it didn’t matter. There was a big part of himself that wanted to talk about this, and an even bigger part of himself that wanted to talk about it with _Nagi._ “Sakura-san gifted me that scarf. A long time ago.”

“… _oh,”_ Nagi sighed, looking away. “You didn’t lose a scarf, then. You lost a _precious memory._ ”

“…Yes, I suppose that’s right.”

“Mm…”

It had been presumptuous of Minami, to think this would be a good idea. His relationship with Nagi was precarious at best, even now, after they had come to terms with each other and they were able to speak even _warmly_ to each other. But there were still things that were of limits for both of them, and Sakura Haruki was definitely one of them.

No matter how much Minami wanted that not to be true.

So he moved up from the bench, quickly getting rid of the snow clinging to his pants before bowing slightly to Nagi, and saying: “I feel like I’ve intruded in your alone time enough as it is, Rokuya-san. Please have a good rest of your day.”

He was running away, Minami knew it. Both metaphorically and literally, as he walked over the snow in the path, back to the café where ZOOL waited for him. It was unheard of, in him; Minami didn’t run away, not if he had any say in it. But with Nagi, well—Minami was never himself with Nagi, in one way or another.

The way Minami’s heart was drumming under the layers of winter clothes wasn’t something he was used to.

“ _Minami!_ ”

As if struck with a magic spell, Minami froze. He didn’t dare to turn around to look at Nagi, but there was no need to; Nagi was running after him. And, when he reached him, he made Minami turn towards him with a gentle hand on his elbow, keeping it there once Minami was looking at him. As if he needed to make sure Minami wouldn’t keep running away.

“You’re _fast_ ,” Nagi commented, sounding amused once again. “It’s not nice to abandon friends like that, Minami.”

The word “friends” coming out of Nagi’s mouth like that made Minami’s heart skip a beat. “I…”

With a swift, elegant movement, Nagi reached up to his own neck and unwound the colorful scarf from around his neck. It was a—hideous thing, Minami had to admit. It was fluffy and warm-looking, sure, but it was as if someone had crammed all the colors of the rainbow in it, trying and failing to assemble them in some kind of order until everything just looked like paint had exploded onto it.

And still, Minami looked at it as if it was a marvel as Nagi wrapped it carefully around Minami’s neck, making sure it sat snug and warm against his skin.

It smelled like him, Minami realized. Fabric softener and what had to be Nagi’s cologne, making his cheeks go red.

“Rokuya-san…?”

“I can’t give you your memory with Haruki back,” Nagi explained as he finished tucking the scarf into the lapels of Minami’s coat. His gloved knuckles brushed against Minami’s jaw for a second. “But I can give you a new one, if you’ll let me.”

“I…” there was heat in Minami’s cheeks, in his eyes, making his vision go misty and unfocused. “Rokuya-san, I can’t—“

“Keep it!” Nagi replied with his usual enthusiasm. Then he grew softer, tugging at the scarf one last time before letting go of Minami completely. “And this promise too: if you ever need to talk about Haruki, or anything, come talk to me. No one should be alone when they’re sad.”

Minami was so embarrassingly close to crying, he had to hide his trembling mouth in the folds of the scarf. It wasn’t that wise of a decision; the scarf really did smell like Nagi, and a very warm feeling was blooming deep in Minami’s chest, pushing away the cold of the winter.

_What an incredible person,_ Minami thought, his heart beating wildly as he looked up at Nagi’s smile. _I want to be worthy of a person like this._

“…Then let the promise go both ways, Rokuya-san,” Minami said with a smile of his own, and was happy when Nagi’s own grew at the sight of it. “Come to me if you ever feel like I could help in any way. I’d be happy to.”

“ _Yes!_ It’s a promise!”

Minami nodded as well, still smiling, and lifted a hand to touch the soft fabric of the scarf around his neck. But Nagi had other plans. Curling his arm around Minami’s, he swiftly turned them both around and started marching down the street, dragging Minami with him away from the bench and into the more livelier parts of the city.

“Now, Minami, I have to ask an important question I ask all of my friends!”

Minami looked up owlishly, still a bit unsure on his feet from Nagi’s quick movements. “And… what is that, Rokuya-san?”

“Minami… have you watched _Kokona?_ ”

A bubbly laugh made it past Minami’s lips and into the cold air. Nagi’s arm tightened around his at the sound, but that only made Minami chuckle even more, his hair hiding Nagi from view for a moment before he decided to turn his head.

Nagi’s soft smile was the most beautiful thing Minami had seen all day, and the warmth in his chest expanded to fill every single space in him.

“Can’t say I have, no,” Minami replied.

It was the perfect answer, because Nagi’s eyes crinkled as his smile grew, making him look even more beautiful than before.

“We have a _date_ , then!”

* * *

In the end, it turned out that Haruki’s scarf _was_ at the apartment, hidden somehow beneath one of Torao’s sweaters and a few of Touma’s magazines. But the next time Minami went out —out to an important _date—_ he picked the rainbow scarf instead, smiling all the while as he wrapped it around his neck and tucked the ends close to his chest.

Even then, it still smelled like Nagi.


End file.
